Thursday, September 13, 2007


Why must the financially challenged always get in the way of the incredibly wealthy?

The search for stinking rich adventurer Steve Fossett's downed experimental aircraft has only turned up wreckage of planes belonging to missing fliers with far less impressive bank accounts.

The fabulously, stupidly rich Fossett had survived a 30,000 foot plunge in a crippled hot air balloon, icy temperatures in a swim across the English Channel and hours alone in shark infested waters. Plus he was filthy, dirty, nasty rich.

And so by rights of being able to farmer-hankey a nasty nose-full of nasal grease into a 10 gallon bucket tight with thousand dollar bills, Steve Fossett and his wreckage demand swift recovery. Instead searchers turn up what's left of some businessman who Tanquerayed it into a mountain flying to Reno during a shitty 1964 divorce.

Searchers believe they've found a half dozen more martini fly-boys scattered out there, no doubt mortgage payers all. An estimated two-hundred more of these cashless crashers litter the Sierra Nevada. None combined earn a line jump past Steve Fossett's billions. The man could pay for over a month of Iraq war, body armour included.

The unbridled audacity. Imagine a young, beautiful girl with straight teeth and curly, blonde hair gets kidnapped. An outraged community bands together and sweeps the neighbourhood, but rescues only a handful of homely and overweight girls with braces and bad skin.

You think Larry King gives a suspender snap? If you ain't got the golden wings then stay out of the golden eagles' flight corridor.

CNN Search for Fossett

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